Busy, busy, busy

Bilbo's been extra busy lately, sending invitations and making arrangements for the party. I asked him if he needed help, but he insists on doing it alone.

"Go away, you'll probrably end up ruining my getaway."

"Sorry."

"You better be. Why don't you go off nitpicking with your friends somewhere?"

So I went to Sam's. He was in his garden, as usual, tending to his crops. He was staring at the soil as if it were a really puzzling math problem.

"Need help, Sam?" I asked, as politely as possible, I might add.

"Shhh... " he whispered, "I have to make sure the HP in the soil is perfect 'n ever'thing... not too acidic... juuuust perfect."

"Goodness, Sam. They're just carrots."

He stared at me like I was crazy. "Just carrots? Just carrots?! Do you know how hard I have to work every day to grow 'im to be like this?" he was yelling. "You really don't have no idea, don't you? "

"So you don't need any help?"

Sam went back to his carrots. "Naw. C'nyou make sure Merry and Pippin ain't nowhere near my CDs?"

"Will do." I said, and went inside his house. It was a complete mess. Clothes, crumbs, and other junk were tossed all over the floor and furniture. Merry and Pippin were jumping on his couch, listening to one of Sam's CDs.

"Merry! Lookit me, Merry! I'm Britney Spears!"

"No, Pip, I'm Britney Spears!"

"I said it first, aye?"

"No, you - hello Frodo!" Merry and Pippin stopped abruptly.

"Would you like to join us?"

"Umm..." I thought of how angry Sam would be when he saw this mess. "Sorry, but I was just leaving. You two have fun, though." I slipped out the door, leaving them doing whatever they were doing. I really don't want to know what that was about. Sam's going to throw a fit when he sees this.

Darnit, still haven't found anything to do.