What to do, what to do...

Sam was rambing on about oliphaunts again while I was over at his house for afternoon tea.

"So maybe, if I somehow get the money... if you follow me, I can finally buy enough paper mache to build one. Ted'll never know what hit 'im!"

"Good luck with that, Sam."

"Well, thank you, I'll need just about all the luck I can get... Oh yes, tea. How many shots would you like in yours, Mister Frodo?"

"I'll have eight." I answered. Sam left the room to get the tea. And that's when I saw it.


What was his super-secret wuvvable huggable bear doing out here under the table? I picked it up. At that instant, he came back, carrying the tray.

"I'm back. I added an extra five-- What're you doing?"

"Nothing."

"Come on." He set the tea on the table. "What're you hiding behind?"

"Nothing. I carry nothing."

"Alright, then, if you say so. Anyway, when my killer robot army pulls apart Ted and the millers' house, I'll bring the oliphaunt right out to stomp on all their--"

"I should be going now."

"Already? But Mister Frodo, the tea-"

"Bilbo's expecting me to... walk... the... dog."

"You got a dog?"

"What? What are you talking about, Sam? You must've had too much pipe-weed this morning. I'll leave you until get your head cleared up." I walked out his door with the bear, still hiding it from his view.

Now comes the question. What's the best way I can torture him with this?